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Never Eat Soggy Waffles

March 17, 2011

Childhood lessons in direction.

  • Never Eat Soggy Waffles – Vis-à-vis a clockwise compass indicating North, East, South, West
    (I disagree. Mmmm maple syrup)
  • Moss grows facing north
    (Sounds lovely, but not always true)
  • The sun rises in the east and sets in the west.
    (Okay but I once drove into a sunset with a compass that pointed east)
  • The lip of the spoon on big dipper points to the North Star
    (Which ones the big dipper again?)

I once drove my rusty but trusty ‘82 Volvo across North America. Starting in Alberta I first traveled west, then headed south, then turned around and went back north, and then a right turn east towards Ontario. Sooner then planned on the latter turn thanks to the labyrinth of highways just outside of Chicago getting the last word that day. I continued on east before one more turn north, and finally a quick westerly left past Niagara Falls to arrive at my final destination of Toronto.

Before I left a friend joked that I’d never find my way because of my notoriously bad sense of direction. Considering my route, she had a valid point. So before I left I stopped at the local Canadian Tire and bought myself one of those handy-dandy little compass thing-a-ma-jigs that you suction cup to your dashboard. A compass ball bobs around in a gel filled globe indicating magnetic north. Problem solved. I eventually made it to my final destination but freely admit I got lost (and found) an awful lot along the way. At the time I blamed the directional meandering on my A.D.D. brain. I had fun so it didn’t matter.

Years later I learned that steel is magnetic and my trusty old Volvo is largely made of steel. Huh, who knew?! So maybe it wasn’t my A.D.D. brain after all that got me all turned about on my travels. More likely it was the fault of my confused, magnetized bi-polar compass instead. Poor thing never really stood a chance. Thereafter I bid adieu to my confused companion and married a land surveyor instead. He does direction for a living. Problem solved.

And just in case, for times when I’m sitting in my living room trying to tell my husband which way I had just come from in some random conversation, I made the table below. It sits in my living room. This compass rose is not influenced by magnified material (well I guess the stand is but that’s a moot point). It sits orientated in the correct northerly direction so I can always get my bearings straight, even while standing in the middle of my living room. How handy is that?! (Note to self, after vacuuming, be sure to place table back exactly as it was).

Next up I’m going to make mosaic rings for my fingers that signify left and right.Mosaic compass table made with vitreous glass.
Blue, brown and gray vitreous glass color palette.
Mosaic compass table made with vitreous glass.

© 2011, Dana Aubrey

One Comment leave one →
  1. Caron permalink
    March 21, 2011 7:24 pm

    Ha ha I love it!

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